Loved, old and fat= happy

Daddy, can I see that Teddy bear?

Then I told him,

Ethan did you know that daddy gave mommy that Teddy bear a long time ago because he loved her?

Chris:

loved? Past tense?

Me:

ha! I guess so! Now you’re stuck with me. Bills, mortgage and 2 kids.

Ethan:

wow! This bear must be REALLY OLD!!!

flashback to last night:
Ethan: *with an evil grin*

daddy your tummy is HUGE!

*chris just looks at me like wth?*

Back to the present:
Me:

See, Daddy, things change. Love is now a thing of the past, we are old and you’re huge. It’s all good. We are happy like this; loved, old and fat!

Please note the sarcasm in our comments. We express love in this family by teasing. It’s how we roll.

A Proposal

Last night I told Ethan to go to bed and he took off running saying “ok mommy!”.

This made me suspicious, of course, because normally bedtime starts with “no!”, “I’m not tired!” or “but I’m gonna miss it”.

(‘it’ being anything that is on tv or happening.)

Don’t get me wrong, once he’s in bed, he’s good. He’s asleep, but getting him there is a process.

So anyhow, imagine my surprise when I come into my room and I see my boy in the middle of my bed, blankets to his chin, fake snoring.

I said, “um… No. You need to go to your bed. This is mommy and daddy’s bed.”

He says, “but I want to sleep with someone!”

I said, “well, when you grow up youll meet a pretty girl and marry her. Then you don’t sleep by yourself anymore.”

He says, in a very serious tone, “I know a pretty girl. I will marry her right now. Mommy, will you marry me?”

at that moment my heart melted…

I told him that I was already married to daddy, but I’d be happy to lay with him, in his bed, until he fell asleep. He said, “okay!” and was knocked out in just a few seconds.

Bed time stories

I try to be sure to read to Ethan before naps and bedtimes, every day. He’s starting to understand the concept of voice to print matching and gets that a spoken word=a word on the page.

So, lately he’s been doing a lot of
what’s that say? when he sees print somewhere, as well as, pointing out signs that he knows.
Ex:
Applebees!! Mommy wook! Applebees!

This afternoon, while finishing the story, he informed me that now he was going to read it and snatched the book from me. He proceeds to say various things that he remembers from the story and then asks me what a certain page said.

I responded with “I think it says that it’s time to stop procrastinating and go to sleep”

To which he wittily responded, while tapping the words on the page:

“no, no, no… It say ‘Ethan take too many naps already. He no go to bed. Mommy is a bum.’ Dat what it say mommy!

Um. No.

It’s the little things

Mommy is super sick tonight, so Daddy opted to pick up take out after he went for his haircut. When Daddy walked in the door, this is what Ethan had to say-

“Daddy! Thank you for bringing home pizza! You just made my dreams come true!”

Tell your friends!

We got out of the car tonight to come in the house and he saw a bug on the sidewalk. He proceeded to smash the bug rather violently and then he said-

“yeah bug! I mash you! Stay away from my house you bug! I leave you there, you tell your friends about me!”
*insert evil laugh*

Excuse me?

“Come in here and make me a cake, old woman! It not gonna make itself!”
—Ethan

Ethan math

“Mommy! Guess what? Daddy give me 2 kisses and you give me 2 kisses, dat make 4 kisses for Ethan!”

So I said, “how about I give you 2 more kisses when we get to school? How many kisses will that be?”

After a few moments, he said “dat make 6 kisses for Ethan!”

He’s growing up so fast!

Trains. Trains. Trains.

My child is obsessed with trains. He loves them and I mean LOVES them. His world revolves around trains. When he can see them, ride them, play with them, everything.

Sigh.

My current world is revolving around trying to get him to poop in the potty.

Sigh.

I think our worlds collided today and for the good!

Today he and I were playing with his trains in his room. He said he was building an airport and the trains were taking supplies in. I was in charge of being the crane who lifted the supplies up and out of the trains.

Then, Ethan farts, loudly. He bursts into a fit of giggles. I tell him that he needs to go sit on the potty now. He freaks out because “I gotta finish my airport!”.

He’s been into MarioKart lately, so I tell him to ‘pause it’ and go potty. He, surprisingly, and successfully goes.
(don’t worry, I will spare you any other details)

As we are washing hands, he says, “mommy! My farts are like train whistles! When you hear a train whistle, you know a choo choo is coming! When you hear a fart, you know poop is coming! I get it!”

Hey. Whatever works.

Hives

So Ethan broke out in hives today, for the first time. I didn’t know what to think.
Daddy, Ethan and I were sitting on our bed. Ethan was watching a movie and Daddy and I were discussing what could have caused the spots.
Ethan sits up, puts his hands out towards us and says,
“hey! You guys! It will be oooookkkkaayyyy. Let’s watch my movie.”

And he puts his hands over our mouths.

Well then.

Night time prayers

“Ethan, let’s say your night time prayers, ok?”

“ok mommy, ‘God is great, God is good and I thank him for my pillow and pizza!’